Weight Watchers Is Magical

I am finally seeing results on the scale. I was actually shocked when I stepped on the scale this morning. I'm not going to get too excited, but there was a 4 pound difference from yesterday morning! We'll see what it says the next few days to see if I actually lost that much. If my weight this morning is right, I've lost 10 pounds so far. I have about 7 more to lose to get to my 10% goal on WW.

I'm still wondering what I was doing wrong before. I'm starting to think that maybe I wasn't eating enough, and my body was holding on to my body fat. I don't know. These past 3 days on WW, I've definitely been satisfied food-wise, and haven't been hungry at night. I told my mom last night that I think WW is magic. She's going to join online too, and we'll be WW buddies. I wish she lived closer. We'd be good motivators for each other.

The gym was good last night. I met with Trainer Andy and we worked out just upper body. I'm feeling stronger, and am surprised with what my body can do. He had me doing bicep curls with 12.5lb dumbbells in front of the mirror. I have to say, I wasn't horrified by what I looked like (If only my teenage acne would go away).

I'm not really feeling a difference in my clothes yet. I'm hoping another 10 pounds will do that for me. Next week is measurements, and I'm a little nervous! What if there's no difference? I feel like there has to be, but you never know.

So, I'm trying to eat different foods this week, and get out of my food rut. I bought these low carb garlic & herb tortillas, and they're really good! Only 50 calories each, and they're high in fiber. For lunch yesterday, I made a wrap with Morningstar chick'n strips, a slice of provolone and lite mayo. I also had a cup of Progresso Light Italian-Style vegetable soup, and lima beans (which I decided I do not like).

Today I'm having the same wrap, but adding veggie bacon and lettuce. I'll post a pic after lunch.

Tonight for dinner is spaghetti squash. I bought a new kind of sauce, and I'll add Morningstar Crumblers. I haven't had pasta since I started this whole thing, so I'm looking forward to that too. Watermelon was on sale this week, so that will be my dessert if I ever decide to cut it up. That is the worst.

So happy it's almost Friday!

xoxo

UPDATE:

I wanted to show my lunch pics. This wrap was seriously delicious.

Also, I just got back from the eye doctor and my vision changed for the worse. It sucks because I have so many boxes of contacts left with my old prescription, but at least I can see now!

xoxo

I'm Pretty Much a Chef

Getting healthy is like having a second job that pays you in sore muscles and expensive grocery bills and kind of takes over your life. I wish I could get my lazy butt out of bed and exercise before work, but I don't see that happening in the near future. Allison and I were talking yesterday about how much better we feel when we're eating well and exercising. It seems pretty simple: eat right, feel good. Eat junk, feel bad. Exercising gives me energy, being lazy makes me tired. Why is it such struggle then? Why did I make the conscious effort to not exercise and eat too much those 4 days? I'm hoping through this journey and through writing this blog I'll learn more about myself and maybe figure out what's going on in this oversized head of mine.

Right before I started back at the gym, I had a meltdown on the phone with my mom. I was trying to figure out when I started gaining weight, and when my relationship with food became abnormal. I look at pictures of when I was 6 or 7, and I was skinny. I think it was 3rd or 4th grade when I first became aware that I wasn't skinny like my friends, and first became self-conscious about my upper arms. I have early memories of binging, but I can't quite remember how old I would have been. My mom puts a lot of the blame on herself, but it's not her fault. She was young when she had me, and we didn't have money growing up. We bought what we could afford, which usually wasn't the most healthy.

My brother is 7 years younger than me, and has always been skinny. My dad has always been thin too. My mom, her 4 sisters and her mom always struggled with their weight. 3 of my aunts have had gastric bypass! Out of my 7 cousins on my mom's side, 4 of them are overweight.  

Having my brother live with me the past 2 months has given me some insight on how skinny people eat. Jon is thin, but he eats like a fat kid, so he's no help. If my brother gets home from work and isn't hungry, he doesn't eat dinner. He doesn't eat just because he thinks he should. He'll make eggs and bacon, and not have toast. Not have toast? That's unheard of to me! I work in a small office, and both women I work with have very good eating habits. They'll often share sandwiches when they order takeout. The one woman always only eats half of her sandwich and saves the rest for the next day. The other woman will order a burger, but not order a side. I would love to have that kind of control, and normal relationship with food.

I've been reading a ton of weight loss blogs, and am so inspired by everyone. It's so crazy to read other people's thoughts, and find they're exactly like yours. It's nice to be able to see people's progress and struggles and know you're not alone. I've also come across recipes that I'm dying to try. Allison and I are making one in particular on Friday, so I'll let you know how it goes.

Last night I attempted to make homemade black bean burgers. I've made them in the past, but never loved them. I couldn't find one recipe that I liked all of the ingredients, so I sort of winged it. They tasted really good, but wouldn't stay together. I put the rest on a cookie sheet in the fridge, so they might firm up a little bit and be easier to cook.

 Andrea's Black Bean Burgers

-1 tbsp olive oil

-1/2 large green pepper, diced

-1 small onion, diced

-1 tbsp minced garlic

-1/4 cup green onions (just the top)

-1/4 cup seasoned bread crumbs

-1 egg white (this may have been what made them too soft, not sure)

-2 cans black beans, rinsed

-2 tsp chili powder (I don't know if it was actually 2 tsp, I don't think it was more than a           

  tbsp though)

-red pepper flakes

-Frank's Red Hot

I sautéed the pepper, onion and garlic in the olive oil. I originally wasn't planning on using a food processer, but changed my mind half way. One can of beans, I mashed with my hands, and left the other can whole. I don't know if that made a difference or not, but I wanted some whole beans in the burger. I added everything to the food processer, and fried them using a non-stick skillet with a little bit of cooking spray. I flattened them so they'd cook through. They ended up breaking into pieces, but still tasted delicious. I wasn't planning on using any bread with them, so it worked out just fine. I also added some chunky salsa, fat free cheddar and a tablespoon of lite sour cream. Delicious!

 This is what happened when I tried to flip them. 

The finished product: black bean pieces!

P.S. I think these are around 3 or 4 WW points each. Not too shabby.

xoxo

You'd Better Sit Down For This One

Something shocking happened. I didn't work out last night. It turns out the possibility of bad weather just in time for my commute home turned into a pretty big snowstorm. We got around 8 inches of snow from 4pm to midnight. It took me 3 times as long to get home, and it was super scary. I was so stressed by the time I actually made it, my whole body ached.  I wanted to go grocery shopping, but the roads were getting worse by the minute so I made due with what I had. I made a tuna melt with a Weight Watchers bagel, and a bowl of Progresso Light Vegetable soup. Not horrible, but I did add saltines. Also, I had to use my brother's regular fat American cheese, because I was out. I went over my daily points by a few on my first day! Failure. Oh, and my brother brought home Samoa Girl Scout cookies. I wish I could say I resisted. I felt pretty bingey last night.

Being off track these past few days has really had an affect on me. I've been feeling down, and really hard on myself. I'm hoping that being back at the gym and training with Andy will help get me back into the swing of things.

So, the snowstorm… I was 45 minutes late for work this morning. It was a super scary commute, and it took me 20 minutes just to clean off my car. The city just doesn't get plowed like the suburbs. Hopefully they'll have everything cleared by the time I'm done working. The sun is shining, but it's still cold out today. Tomorrow's high is 42 I think.

Also, I'm having a very frustrating day at work for a bunch of reasons. I know it's just me. I feel very on edge today.

Hopefully tomorrow is a little better.

xoxo

Forgive Me Readers, For I Have Binged

Well, this weekend has not been kind to me (read: I have not been kind to my body this weekend).

Friday wasn't terrible. Allison and I had to skip Zumba. We wouldn't have had time to pick up the table if we worked out. The guy ended up bringing it to the house for us anyway, but we drove out there first and he followed us back with the table in his minivan. He was the most Italian yinzer ever, and may have been in love with me. He told me to keep in touch. Will do. After the table was all safe and secure inside my house, I made us a quick salad:

-leafy green lettuce

-red peppers*

-chickpeas*

-Morningstar Italian Herb Chik'n patty

-fat free shredded cheese

-steak fries

-lite ranch dressing

-Frank's Red Hot*

*Allison wouldn't eat these items. "Chickpeas taste like balls of dirt."

We scarfed those salads down in record time, picked Jon up from work and went straight to the bar for 80 cent drafts. I was good and only had 3 beers the whole night and made it home by 1:00 or so.

Saturday I woke up and made myself a breakfast of scrambled eggs, 2 slices of veggie bacon and half of a Weight Watchers bagel with some peanut butter. Not a bad breakfast, but I didn't work out before we went to Ohio. We stopped at a convenience store to get coffee (well, for me to get coffee and water and Jon to get Krispy Kreme donuts). I didn't pick at all the goodies Jon's grandma always has at her house, which was hard to do. For dinner, I had hoped to go to the Olive Garden and get their soup and salad for my meal (the breadsticks were going to be my cheat portion of the meal). It was super packed and had a 45 minute wait, so we decided to go to this other little Italian place where they have nothing healthy to eat. Jon ordered a white pizza, and I got an eggplant parm hoagie with fries. I had less than half of it, and 2 pieces of Jon's pizza, and only picked at the fries. There was a decent amount left on the plate, and even Jon was eating them. I did have a few pieces of candy when we got back to Jon's grandma's house, but all in all, I wasn't too disappointed in the day. Although I didn't work out, I kept my food in check waaay more than I would have before I started this process. But then we got home. I didn't want my leftovers in the house on Sunday, so I rationalized eating the rest of them and I would just start fresh the next day. Typical. So I ate the rest of my hoagie and a piece of pizza. I felt horrible, and I was mad at myself. I even woke up in the middle of the night and threw up. I think it was because my body wasn't used to all that junk food.

I woke up early the next day and had Sunday depression right away. I was mad at myself for the way I ate the day before, I didn't have any coffee in the house and didn't feel like leaving to get any. I still was planning on going to the gym when Jon went to band practice, but that never happened. Instead the couch and I became one and I hardly moved all day. It's not even that I ate too much yesterday (nowhere near my old Sunday binges), but I was still upset. I felt like Old Andrea was creeping back in. I'm thrown off track so easily. I know my bad weekend started with skipping working out Friday, even though we had to. It's just frustrating.

Today is a new day though. I decided to join Weight Watchers online again. It's worked for me in the past, and I've heard good things about their Points Plus program. So, we're moving on! I'm not going to dwell on my one bad weekend. I feel better today. The weather is supposed to get bad this afternoon/evening so I'm worried about making it to the gym, but if I can't, I'll do a workout video at home. No more excuses.

xoxo

FRIDAYFRIDAYFRIDAYFRIDAYFRIDAYFRIDAYFRIDAY

Happy Friday! I'm in a good mood today. I went to bed before 11 last night, and sleeping in a king sized bed is pretty awesome.

I bought a new scale from Amazon this week and it already was delivered!

fancy!

I tested it against my old scale to see what the difference was. New scale was .4 pounds heavier. I can live with that. So, this morning when I weighed myself, I was surprised to see that the scale went down a pound! I haven't seen that in 2 weeks!

I'm feeling really good today. My legs don't hurt as bad and seeing a new number on the scale was something I really needed. Last night Trainer Andy was a little bit sympathetic about how sore my legs were, so we focused mostly on upper body. My arms feel rubbery today, but I can at least function.

I haven't mentioned a temptation in a few days! Today's temptation is brought to you by Wolferman's (a Harry & David company). My boss hands me a bag full of english muffins, crumpets and who knows what else. They were a gift to him from someone, and he didn't want it. So, all of these delicious carbs are now a gift for the office. An english muffin party! as my boss would call it.

 I threw in the smiley cookie as an added bonus

It's fine though. I'm not going to cheat, especially not for a stupid english muffin.

Tonight is Zumba with Allison, then we're picking up my new dining room table I found on craigslist! Still debating on going out tonight. I didn't go out last weekend, and it was quite enjoyable. We're going to Ohio to visit Jon's grandma tomorrow. I do have some shopping to do since I never have time during the week, so maybe that will happen on Sunday.

I don't know if I'll be on a computer much the next few days, so have a lovely weekend

xoxo

The. Scale. Will. Not. Budge.

There is nothing I would like more than to have a happy post to write today. The good news is I'm not necessarily feeling whiny today, but still discouraged. The. Scale. Will. Not. Budge. I just don't understand. I'm still trying to stay positive and motivated, but having legs that feel like rubbery lead and struggling to sit down on the toilet to pee, and struggle more to get up from said toilet isn't helping. I'm not even really feeling a difference in my clothes. That honestly could be because I had gained a few pounds before I started this process, so I wasn't even wearing certain clothes because I knew they'd be uncomfortable. I've eliminated carbs at dinner. I did a full hour on the ellipticlimber last night. I've worked out 15 of the past 17 days. I just wish I knew what I was doing wrong, if anything. I did order a new scale from Amazon yesterday. I was cheap and went with the free shipping, so I probably won't have it until the end of next week.

I know with PCOS, you're supposed to go on a reduced carb diet, as your body has trouble processing insulin. I'm going to continue with my current eating the rest of this week, and if by Monday morning the scale still doesn't budge, I'll reduce more carbs next week.

I know I'm getting healthy, and that is also very very important to me, but I also don't want to spend another summer fat. I want cute sleeveless tops and I want this to look good on me:

 Ok, enough of that. I'm meeting with Trainer Andy again tonight. I hope he listens to me when I tell him I physically cannot do any leg work. Arms and abs hopefully will be our focus.

I am so ready for the weekend! Tomorrow is supposed to be 62 degrees! Holy crap.

xoxo

Warning: Whiny Post Ahead: Part II

Today is rough already. My legs are so sore, it's hard to walk. I stayed up too late last night and I'm exhausted and my stomach feels weird. Day 2 of being whiny! Yay!

(note: I wrote this paragraph first thing in the morning - feeling much better now)

I didn't have training until 6:30 last night, so I did 50 minutes on the ellipticlimber (my new term for it) beforehand. I can definitely tell that my body is getting stronger and I'm able to do higher resistances. It was a good feeling. Then I went to the downstairs of the gym to meet Andy. He is a sadist, BUT he has me do things I never thought my body was capable of doing. I talked to him a little bit about how I'm frustrated with the scale. He said that since this much exercise is new to my body, there's a really good chance my body is in shock. I hope that's all it is. He had me do a billion squats combined with arm work. I did some dead lifts with a 25lb kettle bell. It was a rough one.

Even though the scale not reflecting my hard work really sucks, I do feel good. I've been eating perfectly, my back seems to be getting stronger, and I haven't had any real problems with it (knock on wood). This past Friday and Saturday it felt a little off, but I rested Sunday and I'm good as new I've ever been.

Not much else of note today. I have no idea how I'm going to workout with the way my legs feel. I'm going to take some ibuprofen around 4 and hopefully it helps.

xoxo